Fun times. Or not.

Sooooo… on 17 September I got hit by a car while riding to work. Suffice to say fun times have not been the order of the day since.

I have a spiral fracture in my left humerus (which oddly enough isn’t funny at all). This is where the bone breaks up/down instead of across. They’re known for being extremely painful. I’m still sporting a huge bruise on my arm and there’s a lump which hasn’t gone away after four weeks. I also took a whole lot of skin off my left knee. I have three superb scars now but the bulk of it seems to have been something closer to a friction burn. My knee got insanely itchy after a few days and then the skin started to peel off. It’s still itchy now.

I spent four days in hospital because the pain was so bad I was being given morphine and some other heavy-duty opiate that they don’t seem to want to hand out scripts for.

From what I’ve been told, my broken arm is a bit unusual. It takes a considerable amount of force for this sort of fracture to occur and it normally happens in old people with osteoporosis. I’ve been left wondering if a clean break straight through the bone would’ve been better. But it is healing. It just feels like it’s taking forever.

It’s so frustrating. I haven’t been to work in a month. All I seem to do these days is sleep, drink loads of milk, read, watch tv shows and movies. I’m useless at anything else. I can barely take care of myself. Going out and doing things exhausts me, although that is getting better.

I feel guilty because I’m totally depended on Richard for pretty much everything. He’s doing everything at the moment while I sit on my arse. My poor work colleague has been on her own for three weeks now and I feel so bad about that. I hate the fact that I can only just dress myself. I can’t shower on my own – rather I can but I can’t dry myself off. I can’t cook anything. I can’t drive so Richard has to take me everywhere. I feel helpless and I hate it.

I’m still angry with the woman who hit me. I know it’s all her fault because she’s the one who ran a red light. But there’s a still a part of me that thinks I messed up. That I should’ve been able to avoid the accident. I’ve been riding long enough now to have developed the right sort of skills. I’m angry at myself for something I know consciously I couldn’t control. She hit me. She was the one who ran the red light. It’s all her fault but I still feel like I could’ve done something more than just plough straight into her like I did.

I remember the impact. I remember sliding across the bonnet. I don’t remember separating from my bike but I guess that because I was too caught up in landing on the road and being introduced to a whole new world of pain. I now have a new reference point for pain. I thought my back injury was the worst pain I had experienced in my life but this beats it. I’ve never passed out from pain – vomited, yes – but I got very floaty when the ambos had to splint my arm so they could get me off the road.

So yeah… my life for the last month has been all about my arm. I have a calendar full of medical appointments. I see my GP every week and discuss how my arm is going and when I should return to work.

Yesterday I finally had an appointment at the hospital with an osteo surgeon. After waiting over an hour to be seen, I spent about 10 minutes with him. He was surprised I hadn’t been seen by anyone since I was discharged from the hospital. I should’ve had at least one appointment and he was puzzled as to why I wasn’t seen by a doctor when I had x-rays done two weeks later. So there could’ve been something seriously wrong with my arm and I would’ve never known because the hospital totally dropped the ball on my out-patient treatment. But luckily it looks like my arm is healing just fine. I have another appointment in two weeks with a doctor and more x-rays which will hopefully show the fracture has healed. Then I can start rehab.

The other thing the doctor told me was that I’m looking at about three months for full recovery. Three months!!

Kinda explains why I’m still so angry with the woman who hit me. She caused the accident but I’m the one paying for it and will be for quite awhile to come.

Once upon a time…

Two people met. They decided they liked each other enough to get married. And they did – exactly one year ago today.

So here tis… our wedding ceremony!

The only reason there’s a video of our wedding is because my dad decided to buy a small video camera and film it. Well, my dad didn’t film it. My cousin did – under strict instructions to not get in the way of the photographer. This is why the camera never moves during the whole thing. He was down the back, staying out of Lara’s way.

I was always very adamant that we weren’t getting anyone to film our wedding. I was never interested in spending the money on a video that we’d never ever watch. But when my grandmother couldn’t make it, my dad decided it needed to recorded so she could see it. And you know what? These days I’m pretty glad he did. The whole thing went by so fast. It’s all a bit of a blur in my memory so having this video – even though it’s not the best quality – is great.

Our celebrant was the awesome Jon von Goes. He was fun and his take on the whole process felt different. He’s interested in putting on a show and making what can be a dry and boring ceremony into an experience that’s worth being there for. (You have to admit that most of the time the ceremony is the bit you have to suffer through to get to the fun bit – the reception!) I also really liked his idea of not having us sign the wedding certificate stuff during the ceremony. That was done outside on the nearest available flat surface – which in our case was a plinth! – with all the guests mingling about. It meant that the ceremony was all about us (and it didn’t take quite as long!).

Anyhoo… in case you’re interested, the nice wordy bits.

My reading (is super-long so I’m linking to it rather than putting it in) came from Offbeat Bride. Friends of mine used it at their wedding and I just had to have it. Why? Because… zombies!!

Richard’s reading came from Douglas Adams So Long And Thanks For All The Fish.

They looked at each other for a moment.

The moment became a longer moment, and suddenly it was a very long moment, so long one could hardly tell where all the time was coming from.

For Arthur, who could usually contrive to feel self-conscious if left alone long enough with a Swiss cheese plant, the moment was one of sustained revelation. He felt all the sudden like a cramped and zoo-born animal who wakes one morning to find the door of his cage hanging quietly open and the savanna stretching gray and pink to the distant rising sun, while all around new sounds are waking.

He wondered what the new sounds were as he gazed at her openly wondering face and her eyes that smiled with a shared surprise.

He hadn’t realized that life speaks with a voice to you, a voice that brings you answers to the questions you continually ask of it, had never consciously detected it or recognised its tones until it now said something it had never said to him before, which was,

“yes.”



The Asking
(definitely nothing about obeying in here!)

Richard, will you take Lauren to be your wife,
Will you respect, love and cherish her,
Stand by her whatever may come,
Will you give your relationship all it requires and deserves,
So that you can live the rest of your lives together in love and happiness?

(It was nice when he said “I will”. Heh. I, of course said exactly the same thing when asked.)

The Vows
I, Lauren, call on the people here
To witness that I take you,
Richard, to be my husband

I want to be with you always
Just as you are
I choose you above all others
To share my life with me in marriage
I love you, not only for what you are,
but for what I am when I am with you.
I love you, not only for what you have made of yourself
but for what you are making of me.

Want to see our photos again? Go on, they’re pretty awesome.

We owe a huge thank you to…
Jon – for being an awesome celebrant.
The staff at Monstalvat – it’s so beautiful out there and it makes actually having a wedding really easy when you don’t have to go anywhere else.
Louisa – who played the piano so beautifully for us.
Marta – who made the most awesome, delicious wedding cake.
Lara and Paola – Lara was recommended to us by a friend. It turned out to be the most wonderful decision. There are things I’d do differently if I could do it all over but not having Lara photograph our wedding.

To all our family and friends who shared this day with us – thank you. Thank you for witnessing a small moment in time that meant so much us. Thank you for supporting us and being so happy for us.

#Womens100

There was a terrible moment when I realised I was going to be about 3kms short for the Rapha Women’s 100.

I had been so sure when I set out that I would get it. I was so certain I’d gotten it right and that adding a lap of the boulie before meeting up with the other women I would be riding with would give me the extra 20 or so kms I needed. Well, I was wrong! I realised that I’d miscalculated when I was still about 6kms out from home. D’oh!

Riding anywhere near 100kms is a big ask for me at the moment. I’m on the way to restoring my fitness – on and off the bike – but I still have a long, long way to go. I wasn’t even sure I’d be able to achieve the 100kms. But I did. I did it. Admittedly I had to ride around my suburb for about 20 minute to get the extra but I did. It seems like such a crazy thing to do but I guess I really am a cyclist because come hell or high water, I was getting that 100kms.

I so often struggle to find motivation. It’s been really hard to get back on the bike but I think I’m falling in love with it again. It’s such a huge part of me and my relationship with my husband. Without my cycling, I would’ve never meet him and I would’ve missed out on what’s turning out to be a pretty awesome adventure with him.

But this day was about my female friends and that’s fantastic too. I have so many wonderful, strong, fun women in my life now because of my bike.

It was a great day. Thanks to Bek, Marta, Louisa and Helen for making it so.

A question of fitness

I kinda had an huh moment a few weeks ago. I was out on a ride with friends. My friend H (one of the many Hs I know!) and I were paired up and both of us whinging out how unfit we are.

Which seems kinda weird when we’d just ridden 50kms.

Yup, we’d just knocked over a 50km ride at a not too shabby pace and we were both whinging out how unfit we were. That’s weird. But I’m guessing that there are plenty of people our age would struggle to ride 10kms, let alone 50. Hell, there are plenty of people out there who’d be out of breath after a short stroll.

I guess it’s a case of what “fit” means to the individual. My definition of fitness is probably quite different from the average person’s.

For me being fit means that I can smash out 28 minute boulie laps a couple of times a week. Right now I’m struggle to get under 31 minutes – which means I’ve slowed down a lot. (However, I must say that boulie lap times are hugely influenced by strength as well as fitness. I feel very weak on the bike at the moment.) That says to me that I’m unfit and I need to work a good deal harder if I want to returning to my former ways.

Returning to the gym seemed like such a good idea but I seem to be suffering from perpetually heavy legs. Getting on the bike is really hard work. It feels like it’s taking a huge amount of effort to get going. I’m pretty much okay once I’m rolling but ack… the effort to get there kinda sucks. On the flip side, it is nice to feel some muscle firmness in my shoulders and chest. The rest of me might suck but at least that bit is sorting itself out.

Anyhoo… fitness. How you define it. What it actually means to a person.

Uh… yeah.

Starting fresh… again.

Got all motivated, rejoined the gym and even bought new running shoes. See?
New ASICS runners
Then I promptly got a cold. So no gym for me.

My gym program is sitting there, waiting for me and I’m physically incapable of even being shown through it. I get out of breath going up the stairs at the moment.

This will be the third time I’ve endeavoured to lose weight. I guess that’s to my advantage. I’ve done it twice now. Okay, it should’ve only been once but being sick for three months kinda prevents one from going the gym. Anyhoo… yes. Gym. Going. Exercise. Being motivated. Yup.

I’m going to try a slightly different mental approach this time. Last time it was all about losing weight rather than being healthy. So I figure this time it should be about being healthy and letting the weight loss – which will hopefully happen – be a side effect. A good one but still a side effect. I don’t think I’ll drop any sizes or anything but I’m hoping dresses that I’d struggle to squeeze into at the moment will fit again. (Plus Richard bought me this absolutely gorgeous dress that I definitely want to make sure I still fit into.)

I guess the other this is that I want to make sure I can still fit into my wedding dress. The idea was to wear it again at some point and it’s too beautiful to leave rolled up in its dress bag (yes, rolled – you don’t hang dresses like that one). At the moment I doubt I’d be able to wear it with any style or grace.

Hhmm… I suppose that’s me wanting to lose weight. D’oh!

I’m hoping I get a gym program that’s all about building upper body strength. I’ve worked so hard to improve my core but I think I’m still having back pain because the rest of me is so weak. When I was going the gym regularly, my back barely troubled me at all. My back still hurts after 18 months of clinical pilates even though I know my core strength has massively improved. It doesn’t hurt as much but it hasn’t been the miracle solution I hoped it would be. Maybe over-all strength is the next logical thing to try.

To be honest, I’m also hoping it’ll make cycling easier for me. I’m hoping some upper body strength will make climbing easier. I’m pretty certain that lack of upper body strength is what makes it so difficult for me. I hurt when I climb, my back just aches so why would I want to do it? I’m not accomplishing the things my friends are because the pain holds me back.

This all sounds like I have utterly unrealistic expectations of what to happen but having done this before, I know what my body is capable of. I guess what’s to my advantage is that even though the weight is sneaking back on, it’s nowhere near like it was. A lower starting point is a good thing and I’m not expecting to magically lose a huge amount of weight. I only want to shift a couple of kilos.

Figured it was time

Gym membership and appointment card Soooo… yeah. I rejoined the gym.

I quit ages ago when the cycling started to take over and the gym was getting busier and busier, meaning you had to wait longer and longer to use the equipment. (But funnily enough I was still in their system so I have the same membership number.) I decided it must be about time I did something about the midlife weight creep I seem to be suffering from.

It’s hard work lugging 74kg up mountains – which, admittedly I haven’t done since March. Hell, it’s hard work lugging around 74kg commuting to and from work, especially when I’m on Jayne, who weighs 10kms on his own. Add a full pannier bag and it’s probably about 12kgs that I’m asking my body, my legs to push around. Add my own body weight on top of it and it’s a recipe for some effort. (I could look at in a more positive way and think of it as being a great strengthening exercise.)

I do feel fat at the moment. It appears to have gotten a good deal harder to lose weight these days. Tipping over 40 seems to made my body decide it wants to horde all the fat it can. But I am my own worst enemy because all those food that are bad for you? I love them. Eating them makes me happy – especially really good cheese.

I am trying to be better about what I eat. I’m trying to indulge my sweet tooth a good deal less. I haven’t made any cookies for at least two months (caneles and madelaines on the other hand…) I’m making less ice cream. I’m trying to eat less junk at work. I guess I have to move from trying to doing. As Yoda said: “Do or do not. There is no try.”

So… This is me doing something about my weight.

So, there’s that mountain again

Okay… So, apparently my Garmin lost its little electronic mind and decided my ride was 22 hours long.

It did freak out about half way down Mt Buller and decided it couldn’t find any satellites. Kinda ruins a ride when you lose the second half of your descent. It wasn’t a great descent any way. Actually it was probably the worst one I’ve ever had. I was just bad at it – no confidence in what I was doing and speeds I’m normally happy at felt way too fast.

This was probably cause by the fact that I had a watch a guy nearly go careering off a ridge at the top of the climb onto the road below – a drop of about 10 metres. (For those who know the climb – right near Hell Corner so the really steep bit.) Two riders went flying past us and then the next thing we knew, one was off the road, on the grass and heading towards the edge. I have no idea how he managed to get back onto the road but he did. Not a good thing to see and I’m sure brown trouser time for the guy on the bike.

However! I did a PB up the mountain – 1:26:33. And as a friend said: all PBs are feel goods 🙂

I’m on the quest for a new saddle. Again. I’ve already tried outtwo Specialized test saddles: a Romin and an Oura. The Romin seemed okay which lead me to try the Oura. I’ve tried an Oura before and it didn’t work out well but I thought that might’ve been caused by me having a displaced hip (one was lower than the other). Turns out it’s the Oura and not me at all. Sigh. I’m getting a bit jack trying to find the right saddle. I simply can’t find it. I think I’m up to saddle no. six. Maybe it’s me. Maybe it’s how I sit on the bike. Maybe I wasted a huge amount of money on a bike I’m never going be 100% comfortable on. Ack… that’s a pretty awful thought.

So, I’ve finally decided I should try a Selle SMP saddle. I’m not that enamoured with how they look but if it’s comfy I’m going to learn to love it. I’m off to Kaos Custom Bikes on Saturday morning to get one fitted. Wish me luck!

You can call me the tubster

Actually, on second thought, don’t.

The weight starting sneaking back when I hurt my back in 2012 after doing Amy’s Gran Fondo. It was pretty bad. My ability to exercise dropped way off because I simply couldn’t move like I once did. I did shed some weight in 2013 but it seemed like it was only temporary. I did manage to get back down to 70kg for the wedding but that’s only because I had listeria poisoning. Three weeks before the wedding I was 72.5kg. How do I remember this when the wedding was six months ago? Because I was genuinely shocked at dropping 2.5kg in a week.

(Still, that’s not as bad as when I did Amy’s Ride on a 45°C day and dropped from 69kg to 66kg. *coughs* I was a wee bit dehydrated. But it all came back on after a few days as it should’ve.)

Anyhoo… I weighed myself this morning. I am a very bleugh 74kg, up last week from 73.8kg. I have clothes that I know I would struggle to fit into at my current weight. Beautiful dresses that I can’t wear because I’ve become too much of a tubby. But I don’t know… That’s my impression of myself. I think I look I’m about the size of elephant but it’s patently not true.

After all, compare this:
Lauren in a sparkly dark blue dress

with this:
Fat Lauren

The top photo was taken four days ago. The bottom one is from 2005. There is a visible difference between the two photos. My face is no longer all puffy and apparently I’ve started buying much better bras. 😛

I can see that I’m slimmer in the first photo but I feel like I look like I did in the second photo. Which is stupid. I know that I should be concerned about my weight gain because it’s not too healthy. But I know I’m concerned about my weight gain because of how I think I look. I should be worrying about my health and not give two figs about what I look like. I had two sets of blood tests done in 2013 and both came back saying I was extremely healthy. Even with the extra weight, I’m in rude health and not at risk of any major illness – like diabetes for example.

And that’s what I should be concerned about.

I should be concerned about doing what I need to do to keep myself healthy. I’ve always had a bit of a problem with fat acceptance (which seems to say that it’s okay to be fat regardless of the consequences) but I’ve tended to agree with the message of the health at any size concept. I have just as much value at size 16 as I did when I was a size 12. I’m still the same person. However, I was horrendously unhealthy when I was size 16 (and accelerating towards 18 and higher). I couldn’t get up a small flight of stairs without being out of breath and feeling like my heart was going to burst right out of my chest. I didn’t feel any sense of wellness, even though I wasn’t sick. The initial weight loss was liberating, not because I looked better but because I could move freely. I felt well. I felt good.

I guess that at the moment I’m struggling to like my body as it currently is. I feel fat and bloated. I feel like I’m sluggish and slow (although this morning’s ‘power lap’ on Yarra Boulevard says otherwise!). Maybe I feel like my body has betrayed me because I have put on weight. We’re in a struggle when we shouldn’t be.

After all, my body really is amazing. It does some really cool things like regulate my temperature, keeps my heart beating, controls my muscles so I can type and scratch my temple (which I just did) without me even being conscious of it. Well, I’m aware that I’m typing but I’m not telling my fingers to type a conscious level. It’s not the enemy.

It’s my thinking that’s the problem. I need to change the perception I have of myself, if that makes sense. I know I’m never going to be model thin and, to be honest, I don’t want to be. But I can’t help but wish I was slimmer. The bizarre thing about thinking like this is that I’m not sure what being slimmer would really do for me. Well, one obvious answer is that it’d make riding up mountains a hell of a lot easier! But apart from that, I have no clue. Being slimmer isn’t going to make me more successful at work – my brain needs to do that. Being slimmer isn’t going to net me a husband – already got one. Being slimmer isn’t going to suddenly lead to fame and fortune – not that I want to be famous anyway (some extra fortune would be nice though *lol*).

So how do I change my thinking? Maybe I need to simplify it. I mean, all I really care about is being able to ride my bike and having a quiet simple life. So… can I ride my bike as I am right now? Yes, I can. Does my appearance when I’m on my bike and fully kitted up really matter? Well, no. It’s not like I can see my arse or my flabby guts when I’m riding anyway. Does my husband love and accept me as I am right now? The way he is with me suggests a most definite yes. Does he care about the way I look? Maybe a little bit but it’s because he wants me to be healthy. It’s not about me being fat. Am I going to be any better off if I suddenly lost 10kg? Possibly but the effort that would go into doing it would make me pretty unhappy. And maintaining it wouldn’t be a lot of fun either.

So, what now? 10 years ago I probably would’ve been in tears by now and stuffing my face with chocolate. Or ice cream. And making a bad situation even worse. I’m more than aware that I always give into temptation. I love chocolate. I love ice cream. I love cake. So maybe the solution is to love them a little less. And to be honest – get over it. All this angst about how I look is idiotic and a huge waste of time. I look the way I look.

So there you go, self! Build a bridge and get over it!!

2013 in 40 questions

1. What did you do in 2013 that you’d never done before?
Got married!

2. Did you keep your new year resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Meh. Who needs them?

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yup. Sister-in-law and a friend both welcomed little boys into their families. A work colleague had twin boys! And another one had a little girl. Wow… lots of babies!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No thank god!

5. What countries did you visit?
France.

6. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked in 2013?
I think I’d like for 2014 to be a bit quieter on the whole. 2013 was pretty intense, lots of things going on. Moving house and acquiring a mortgage will be enough for next year.

7. What date from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
August 31. Getting married tends to be a stand out.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finally wiggling out of my old job that I really didn’t like (but was stuck in). It’s not just my doing obviously but it made my life so much better and I did have to do an interview – which I am very bad at.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not being prepared enough to ride up Mt Hotham. I really wanted to do it this year but I was utterly underdone for it. Mt Buffalo and Fall’s Creek will have to do. (And Donna Buang a week later because two mountains wasn’t enough apparently.)

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
2013 will go down as the year of sickness. Had colds, gastro, a migraine but the big one was getting listeria poisoning two weeks before the wedding and having to go the E.D. so I could be put on a drip. That sucked.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My BMC. And then the new wheels to go on him. Awesome bike! Love him to death!!

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
There are two people who’s professionalism and behaviour made my life better because they made my experiences on the bike better.

First one is Chris from Bike Now. He did a bike fit for me and all he cared about was making sure I was in the best possible position I could be. I’ve been back to see him three times since the initial bike fit in March. The last visit was on Monday. He really listened to everything I said and asked all sorts of questions to make sure he was clear about what I was experiencing on the bike and what I wanted to get out of my riding.

Second on is Dan from Shifter Bikes. He’s a freaken genius. Richard and I went to see him because it was time for Richard to get new wheels. However, after a very frightening experience during the descent on Lake Mountain (speed wobbles at 70km/h) I decided I needed some different wheels as well. We talked for about 10 minutes, I explained what I had experienced and he immediately came up with a solution. The wheels he built are brilliant. I feel better on the bike because I know I can trust what’s rolling underneath me. Plus, I was really flattered when he instragram’ed my bike.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
So much for the promises from our politicians that they’d be better behaved. The Victorian lower house descended into an absolute farce this year with several motions of no confidence in the Speaker. And it’s not much better at the federal level. It really does seem that the politicians are all in love with with their own bloated sense of power. But we elect them so who’s to blame?

14. Where did most of your money go?
Bike, bike, bike, WEDDING! Good lord weddings are expensive.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ummm… this will sound awful but I was way more excited about picking up my BMC than I was about the wedding. I’m talking feelings on the day, not the overall experience. The day of the wedding I was so grumpy. It took until me actually getting the venue before I started to enjoy myself. But the BMC had immediate rewards! Except the bit where Richard forgot it was on the roof rack and nearly drove under the carport before I screamed STOP, STOP, STOP!! Not a good memory!

16. What song will always remind you of 2013?
Clair de Lune. It was my entrance song for the wedding played so beautifully by my friend Louisa. Every time I hear it, I always think of the moment of standing outside the door to the hall with my dad, waiting for the right moment to make my grand entrance.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? pretty happy
ii. thinner or fatter? thinner!
iii. richer or poorer? about the same

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Really should’ve done more riding. I didn’t meet a goal (conquering Mt Hotham) because of lack of preparation.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying about the wedding. Including the weather. Stupid to worry about the weather. You have absolutely zero control over it so you have to let it go. But I got lucky. We had the most amazing day. It was about 10°C warmer than it should’ve been and it was a beautiful sunny day.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Really late putting this up so it’s already passed. Spent the day with Richard’s extended family. It was nice.

21. What was your favorite month of 2013?
September. Who wouldn’t enjoy tootling around France for three week and basically having the entire month off work?

22. Did you fall in love in 2013?
Can’t do that if you already are 😉

23. How many one-night stands?
None.

24. What was your favourite TV programme?
Masters of Sex. Such a good show! Loved Castle and A Game of Thrones too. Oh… and Sherlock. The last ep of that was extraordinary.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope.

26. What was the best book you read?
Raising Steam – the latest Terry Pratchett novel. I wasn’t sure about it at first but thoroughly engrossed by the end.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I”m so boring. I don’t really listen to new music any more. I’m sticking with what I know. And besides, Nine Inch Nails released a new album in 2013.

28. What did you want and get?
A new camera. I bought one as a birthday present to myself. Been wanting one for ages.

30. What was your favourite film of this year?
Nothing immediately leapt to mind but that’s because I haven’t really gone to the movies that much this year. Kept meaning to but other things kept getting in the way – namely the wedding. But I did really enjoy Iron Man 3. Won’t deny it was flawed (because it certainly was) but it was fun. I also really enjoyed Star Trek: Into Darkness. Benedict Cumberbatch was awesome as Khan.

Joss Whedon’s Much Ado About Nothing is still on my absolutely must watch list.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Umm… nothing. I was recovering from listeria poisoning and we were getting married a week later. I turned 41.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I actually don’t know. I’m very content with how my life is at the moment. I’m finally with someone who I love being with and we’re planning out a life together. It’s pretty cool.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2013?
Same as always but now with added dresses!

34. What kept you sane?
Richard. Awful amount of pressure to put on him *lol* But seriously, his presence in my life has got me on an even keel finally. I’ve finally worked out that a less complicated life is a better one. Something quiet and not that extraordinary is good. I don’t know why we’re all supposed to have extraordinary lives and do great things with them. Maybe it’s better to have a simple, quiet life and do what you want to rather than doing what you think you should to make others happy.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Meh…

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Politicians just make me angry so I’m trying to stay away.

37. Who did you miss?
As always, my American peeps.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
My workmate Julia. She’s a little ray of sunshine every day. I know that sounds twee and annoying but she’s always smiling, always positive and a freaken amazing cook!

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013
Focus on the stuff that makes you happy. Worry less about everything else. And that life is always, always surprising.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Nary a song lyric is coming to mind.

Hey look! It’s December 25!!

Season’s greeting to all those I hold dear, near and far. To those far – you are never far from my thoughts. To those near – well, you know…

(Tim says it better than I ever could. That’s why I keep putting it up every year.)